in conversation with hugh askton and dagny taggart , he said " fire a dangerous force tamed at man's finger tips" while referring to that $ brand cigarette.
sorry Mr. akston it is that 6 inches is what which has tamed man it slowly consumes him from within while ebbing the illusion of ecstasy the pleasure which he derives from it , is actually his death warrant believe it or not , accept it or not its the truth.
yet...
Friday, May 2, 2008
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
...
the room was hazy with smoke and he occupied the solitary chair. the lights were out he was contemplating whether he liked darkness or let the light simmer the room. the ash tray was lying on the table filled with contempt as ash grazed its boundaries. He always wanted to be sure of himself,
always wanted to know what was happening in his life,
and how dare things got out of control but they did and this is what brought him to the solace of 2 pack, sit and think something he had long forgotten to do in this impeccable world. his thoughts wandered to the last few days with the memories dancing before his eyes only if he had understood their significance in time .... alas! life is never fair it always screws you when you least expect it.
he had to make THE decision of his life her or career for neither can survive other. one has to be sacrificed at the alter of life.
the memories flashed before him making it even more difficult for him to choose his brain was faltering him, never in his life he was an emotional fool (as he called them) but stakes have reversed now he has become one of them. his work gave him so much joy when he worked, he worked the world lay at his doorsteps people ceased to matter nothing could come between him and his brains put on paper he was so content until she happened that's life he kept telling himself but within he knew what havoc it was creating. ignorance is bliss someone said .
he had never gone against his ego he had never compromised on himself he had never uttered a word of regret he had never rendered an apology for there was no desire there was no need of company, perhaps he was a loner perhaps but he withstood it all.
his eyes were expressionless his face was a hollow mass of 1000 year old banyan tree his hands were shaking his mouth fumed with smoke
it was 4:00 AM he had two hours to decide
until now he never considered himself to be weak, he lit the umpteenth cigarette and looked down through the window of this 49th storeyed flat and laughed frivolously......
always wanted to know what was happening in his life,
and how dare things got out of control but they did and this is what brought him to the solace of 2 pack, sit and think something he had long forgotten to do in this impeccable world. his thoughts wandered to the last few days with the memories dancing before his eyes only if he had understood their significance in time .... alas! life is never fair it always screws you when you least expect it.
he had to make THE decision of his life her or career for neither can survive other. one has to be sacrificed at the alter of life.
the memories flashed before him making it even more difficult for him to choose his brain was faltering him, never in his life he was an emotional fool (as he called them) but stakes have reversed now he has become one of them. his work gave him so much joy when he worked, he worked the world lay at his doorsteps people ceased to matter nothing could come between him and his brains put on paper he was so content until she happened that's life he kept telling himself but within he knew what havoc it was creating. ignorance is bliss someone said .
he had never gone against his ego he had never compromised on himself he had never uttered a word of regret he had never rendered an apology for there was no desire there was no need of company, perhaps he was a loner perhaps but he withstood it all.
his eyes were expressionless his face was a hollow mass of 1000 year old banyan tree his hands were shaking his mouth fumed with smoke
it was 4:00 AM he had two hours to decide
until now he never considered himself to be weak, he lit the umpteenth cigarette and looked down through the window of this 49th storeyed flat and laughed frivolously......
gibberish
for once i shed my ego
for the lost friend
with time, my battle begins
for i have none at my hands
to win her again, i must
the 10 year itch hurts
gate of destiny never shuts
I remembered all along,
did she?
it is a small world
we met again
time had struck a vital blow
people change with the flow
i seek her company, not for love
but for reasons which are in the trove
all these years i had waited
lost you once never again
for the lost friend
with time, my battle begins
for i have none at my hands
to win her again, i must
the 10 year itch hurts
gate of destiny never shuts
I remembered all along,
did she?
it is a small world
we met again
time had struck a vital blow
people change with the flow
i seek her company, not for love
but for reasons which are in the trove
all these years i had waited
lost you once never again
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Sunday, November 18, 2007
blood
one more setback happened
i had decided to donate blood to the blood bank which is visiting my college. with a emotional heart :P
i went to donate it. after filling the forms and all crap stuff when it was my turn to meet the doctor she asked if i had any long term illness i said yes i had contacted jaundice when i was in 10th . i was infected for say 10 days. that's when she dropped the bombshell said 'anurag you can't give blood since u had jaundice you can't give it ever its a permanent deferral' i was shell shocked its like someone says 'you have aids ,
your goddamn fucking blood is infected you even can't give it to someone '
not even someday if someone close to me needs it i just can't
i had decided to donate blood to the blood bank which is visiting my college. with a emotional heart :P
i went to donate it. after filling the forms and all crap stuff when it was my turn to meet the doctor she asked if i had any long term illness i said yes i had contacted jaundice when i was in 10th . i was infected for say 10 days. that's when she dropped the bombshell said 'anurag you can't give blood since u had jaundice you can't give it ever its a permanent deferral' i was shell shocked its like someone says 'you have aids ,
your goddamn fucking blood is infected you even can't give it to someone '
not even someday if someone close to me needs it i just can't
Monday, November 12, 2007
Public transport , an orgy
At some point of time we all must have traveled by some public mode of transportation. lemme share with you some of my weirdo experiences
I was in class xii when this happened so here it goes
waiting on the station for the rickety chapra express on the lucknow station, the train was scheduled to arrive at 6 30 am but after some time they announced the train was late by an hour i was dejected. thanks to the booming population i had to sit on my suitcase . I was a bit senti as i had left my home early in the morning then i saw this poor girl must be around 7 (the same age i was packed off to school) and as i was looking at her she came to me to ask for money i didn't know what to do so i hushed her away on the pretext of buying water. when i came back she was doing her usuall rounds going to people. my eyes couldn't leave her, everyone shooed her . it was just too much already my eyes were half watery (how ever tough u may be but when u leave home your eyes do get wet ) i went to her and gave her 50 bucks and came back sat on my suitcase fished out a book from my rucksack.
after say 10 minutes there were 10 kids surrounding me !!
what next u can imagine
six months later
while returning from mumbai i was sitting next to this very cute girl we got into a small talk and somehow the hours felt like minutes then something happened i fail to understand even today something i said or something i did she said ' what are you hitting at i am married' and poor me i was hell embarrassed Kodak moment for sure
i was traveling in a bus with my sister she was at the window seat i beside her and next to me was a woman wearing a burqa with a toddler in her arms halfway through the journey her head would fall on my shoulder i was so exasperated but didn't have the guts to say anything my sister saw this and the next time her head touched my shoulder my sister pushed her away and gave her such looks only 2 women can understand perhaps but thanks to her that woman stayed inches away from me.
I was in a bus with a friend returning from world book fair when a drunkard boarded the bus . a group of fellow passengers threw him out from the window while the bus was gaining speed for a second i was like what the hell but then i started to laugh at the scenario
Traveling in bus i was sitting on the last seat. unfortunately i got a seat ,anyway after sometime a group of women boarded the bus . one sat next to me there was place for one the second one squeezed in between chalo theek hai afterall its india and the third one sat on my lap !! i said " hello, you are sitting on my lap please do you mind" she said "i am not sitting over you" absolutly hilarious then i tried to wiggle out of my seat but you know buses in delhi i couldn't move an inch some of my friends saw this and started laughing uncontrollably instead of helping me out. finally i managed to move out and then the guts of that damn woman she actually thanked me for giving her my seat and even said nowadays we don't find people like me who would leave a seat for a woman . like hell i would or care nevertheless i decided next time someone pulls this type of crap i will give it straight back to that person
another incident while in bus we were returning from auto expo 2007 and were in high spirits as our stop was coming closer we decided to move towards the gate. in the process one of my friends accidentally tripped on a girls dupatta and fell over her and her mother became so hysterical cursing us. we were hoping she wouldn't create a bigger scene and gather a crowd duly apologized and left
I was returning from my relatives place so took an auto till college thinking its time i say goodbye to buses but no my fate has something else planned a damn eunuch stopped the auto and sat next to me. i was like huh ok . he/she asked me what the time was i took out my cell and told the time. the next request was can i use your cell i have to make one local call i politely declined said i don't have much balance. next 10 seconds were crucial i was contemplating what to do and the next thing which happened was he/she grabbed my hand! i was shell shocked immediately i pulled back my hand he/she said "what's wrong in this " i said get away from me and i asked the auto driver to lessen the speed and jumped out
A Narrow Escape indeed
I was at the varanasi station going to board a train back to home on the over bridge i had a sky bag and a rucksack out of no where a group of eunuch es surrounded me and asked for money luck for me i took mom's advice and my walled had only few wads of currency i said i don't have anything. they started laughing and one of then said a few censored words
i just ran ran and ran and the people over there they saw i was surrounded but on one came to help me out damn this junta
hmm kaafi bore kar diya i guess
that's all for now lets see what the future holds :P
I was in class xii when this happened so here it goes
waiting on the station for the rickety chapra express on the lucknow station, the train was scheduled to arrive at 6 30 am but after some time they announced the train was late by an hour i was dejected. thanks to the booming population i had to sit on my suitcase . I was a bit senti as i had left my home early in the morning then i saw this poor girl must be around 7 (the same age i was packed off to school) and as i was looking at her she came to me to ask for money i didn't know what to do so i hushed her away on the pretext of buying water. when i came back she was doing her usuall rounds going to people. my eyes couldn't leave her, everyone shooed her . it was just too much already my eyes were half watery (how ever tough u may be but when u leave home your eyes do get wet ) i went to her and gave her 50 bucks and came back sat on my suitcase fished out a book from my rucksack.
after say 10 minutes there were 10 kids surrounding me !!
what next u can imagine
six months later
while returning from mumbai i was sitting next to this very cute girl we got into a small talk and somehow the hours felt like minutes then something happened i fail to understand even today something i said or something i did she said ' what are you hitting at i am married' and poor me i was hell embarrassed Kodak moment for sure
i was traveling in a bus with my sister she was at the window seat i beside her and next to me was a woman wearing a burqa with a toddler in her arms halfway through the journey her head would fall on my shoulder i was so exasperated but didn't have the guts to say anything my sister saw this and the next time her head touched my shoulder my sister pushed her away and gave her such looks only 2 women can understand perhaps but thanks to her that woman stayed inches away from me.
I was in a bus with a friend returning from world book fair when a drunkard boarded the bus . a group of fellow passengers threw him out from the window while the bus was gaining speed for a second i was like what the hell but then i started to laugh at the scenario
Traveling in bus i was sitting on the last seat. unfortunately i got a seat ,anyway after sometime a group of women boarded the bus . one sat next to me there was place for one the second one squeezed in between chalo theek hai afterall its india and the third one sat on my lap !! i said " hello, you are sitting on my lap please do you mind" she said "i am not sitting over you" absolutly hilarious then i tried to wiggle out of my seat but you know buses in delhi i couldn't move an inch some of my friends saw this and started laughing uncontrollably instead of helping me out. finally i managed to move out and then the guts of that damn woman she actually thanked me for giving her my seat and even said nowadays we don't find people like me who would leave a seat for a woman . like hell i would or care nevertheless i decided next time someone pulls this type of crap i will give it straight back to that person
another incident while in bus we were returning from auto expo 2007 and were in high spirits as our stop was coming closer we decided to move towards the gate. in the process one of my friends accidentally tripped on a girls dupatta and fell over her and her mother became so hysterical cursing us. we were hoping she wouldn't create a bigger scene and gather a crowd duly apologized and left
I was returning from my relatives place so took an auto till college thinking its time i say goodbye to buses but no my fate has something else planned a damn eunuch stopped the auto and sat next to me. i was like huh ok . he/she asked me what the time was i took out my cell and told the time. the next request was can i use your cell i have to make one local call i politely declined said i don't have much balance. next 10 seconds were crucial i was contemplating what to do and the next thing which happened was he/she grabbed my hand! i was shell shocked immediately i pulled back my hand he/she said "what's wrong in this " i said get away from me and i asked the auto driver to lessen the speed and jumped out
A Narrow Escape indeed
I was at the varanasi station going to board a train back to home on the over bridge i had a sky bag and a rucksack out of no where a group of eunuch es surrounded me and asked for money luck for me i took mom's advice and my walled had only few wads of currency i said i don't have anything. they started laughing and one of then said a few censored words
i just ran ran and ran and the people over there they saw i was surrounded but on one came to help me out damn this junta
hmm kaafi bore kar diya i guess
that's all for now lets see what the future holds :P
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